Hi Smith,
Thank you for your comments. At this point, I am unsure whether Ira or I should address Last Call comments. However, since several of your comments relate to the updates I made, I will respond with my thoughts. At any rate, since Ira is very busy, I would be happy to take care of editorial issues, leaving technical issues to those more familiar with the subject. Ira, please let me know if this is OK with you.
1. There are 3 sentences that start with "Originally”:- Yes. the second and third instances can simply be removed, with it being clear the original “Originally” still holds. Although, I am not fond of “originally” since it is unclear when that was. Perhaps the paragraph might start with “Before the introduction of open Print standards…”?
2. All instances of "RFC 2911" should be changed to cite "RFC 8011". - Yes, sorry I missed these. A global change will work.
3. Should the title be something other than simply "Recommendations"? -"Implementation Recommendations" would work, if that is preferred. I would avoid "Conformance Recommendations" in a best practices document since it sounds too much like a formal specification.
4. "Implementations of this Best Practices document conform to...- " Well, I was trying to avoid formal conformance words. Perhaps it would be better to use the wording at the start of the section “ implementations that are in accord with this Best Practices document conform to the …”
5. "Implementations of this Best Practices document follow..." Again, trying to avoid conformance terms. I do not see where “should” is necessary. Perhaps it would be better “Implementations in accord with this Best Practices document follow”.
Thanks, Bill Wagner
From: Kennedy, Smith (Wireless Architect)
Sent: Thursday, May 18, 2017 10:57 PM
To: PWG Semantic Model v3 Reflector; Kennedy, Smith (Wireless Architect); Ira McDonald; Paul Tykodi; William A Wagner
Subject: HP Inc. has reviewed the JDFMAP specification and has comments
Greetings,
A few editorial comments:
* Section 3.1 : There are 3 sentences that start with "Originally, ...".
* Section 3.1, line 272 : All instances of "RFC 2911" should be changed to cite "RFC 8011" (references in section 9 are already updated).
* Section 5, line 795 : Should the title be something other than simply "Recommendations"? Like for instance "Implementation Recommendations" or "Conformance Recommendations"?
* Section 6, line 841 : "Implementations of this Best Practices document conform to..." >>> "Implementations of this Best Practices document should conform to..." (missing should) ?
* Section 7, line 858 and 862 : "Implementations of this Best Practices document follow..." >>> "Implementations of this Best Practices document should follow..." (missing should) ?
Smith
/**
Smith Kennedy
Wireless Architect - Client Software - IPG-PPS
Standards - IEEE ISTO PWG / Bluetooth SIG / Wi-Fi Alliance / NFC Forum / USB IF
Chair, IEEE ISTO Printer Working Group
HP Inc.
*/