attachment-0002
<html><head>
<meta http-equiv="Content-Type" content="text/html; charset=us-ascii">
<meta content="MSHTML 6.00.6000.17104" name="GENERATOR"></head>
<body>
<div><font face="Arial">Comments against November 2, 2011 draft of Sys.
Object and Sys. Control Service Semantics </font></div>
<div> </div>
<div><font face="Arial">Line 20: should be model includes, not model
include<br>Line 23: clarify what "all the conditions" means; also should be
Subunit not Subunits.<br>Line 28: left justify text at the bottom of the cover
page<br>Line 104: Table of contents alignment needs to be fixed (right justify
page numbers)<br>Line 176: the word object needs upcasing<br>Line 177: duplicate
Imaging Device.<br>Line 182: missing word, should be "requests to modify the
System Object's"; also not really comfortable with the word "data" at the end of
that sentence<br>Line 194: should be referencing the RFC for the conformance
terms<br>Line 204: reword to ...mat them to applications and
communication..."</font></div><font face="Arial">
<div><br>Line 208: rework this section to remove the statement about compound
services and workflow protocols not being addressed in this specification as to
being<br>because of the Charter. The fact is that this document doesn't address
these topics so just say that. At some point in the future the Charter
might <br>be updated to address these topics.<br></div>
<div>Line 220: Reword the last sentence to remove the "abstract
consideration"...<br>Line 222: The font of this section does not match the rest
of the text in the docukment. Also need to refer to Figure 1. in the text of
this section<br>Line 240: is SystemcontrolService Clients the same as System
Client?<br>Line 247: extra period at the end of the sentence<br>Line 248:
incorrect figure reference (should be Figure 2)<br>Line 261: incorrect reference
to PWG 5108.01; not the right title.<br>Line 246: Figure 3 is not reference in
the text<br>Line 272: broken reference<br>Line 278: not sure the table caption
needs to state that these are "new elements" also there's no reference to this
table in the text and the font in the table is too large<br>Line 281: the word
DeviceS's needs fixing<br>Line 288: need a space between the 2 and the word
lists<br>Line 293: remove the word "new" from the table caption, not all of
these are new. Also the description of ConfiguredServices and ServiceInstance is
exactly the same<br>need to differentiate the two elements.<br></div>
<div>Line 298: last sentence is mis-worded<br>Line 310: No reference to this
figure in the text of the document.<br>Line 344: Shouldn't this be for either
table 3 or table 4 notes?<br>Line 351: wrong table reference here as well as in
Line 344.<br>Line 357: Should be notes for table 3 and 4???<br>Line 381:
IsAcceptingJobs/....should be set to 'false' here NOT 'true'<br>Line 394: Need a
period at the end of the sentence<br>Line 401: Extra period at the end of the
sentence<br>Line 401: Should be Table 5 NOT Table 3.<br>Line 407: throughout the
section symbol is used for internal references but here the word "paragraph" is
used.<br>Line 409: Figure text is unreadable (make figure larger)<br>Line 412:
Need page break before Table 5 so entire table is on the same page.<br>Line 421:
Grammar error and the sentence needs clarifying; should be ...the
SystemControlService MUST accept this request and transition<br>all the
currently active Job-based Services....." (transition not transitions; and
clarify which service your talking about here.<br></div>
<div>Line 428: Same comment as for Line 421.<br>Line 437: need single quotes
around 'true'<br>Line 437: What does "Note that parameters control subsequent
behaviour (See below)" mean??? and where's BELOW in both cases in Line
438.<br>Line 439: need a period at the end of the sentence.<br>Line 450: Same
comment as for Line 437/438.<br>Line 474: last sentence is a duplicate of the
sentence in Line 472.<br>Line 485: last sentence is a duplicate of the sentence
in Line 484.<br>Line 506: broken reference<br>Line 514: need period at the end
of the sentence.<br>Line 516: need to improve the work breaks in the last
column. (adjust column widths and text size)<br>Line 526: Grammar error
(sentence beginning with the word AND)<br>Line 530: not sure what "conformance
issues" we are describing here (need a better word)<br>Line 533: Need to clarify
that this is talking (presumably) about the System Client as discussed earlier
and replace the word client with System Client.<br>Line 542: need period at the
end of the sentence.<br>Line 553: The font of this list item is larger than the
others<br>Line 563: bad reference (shouldn't be to Table 1).<br>Line 576: This
list item isn't really a conformance requirement for a conforming implementation
as the section introduction implies.<br>(move it to the top of the section in
the introduction or remove completely.<br></div>
<div>Line 578: Is this specification really "Abiding" by the guidelines or
simply "Consistent with" (also Line 581,584).</div></font>
<div><font face="Arial"></font> </div>
<div align="left">
<div class="Section1" align="left"><span style><img height="44" src="cid:421385217@12122011-05EE" width="170"></span></div>
<div class="Section1" align="left"><span style>
<div align="left"><font><font face="Tahoma"><strong>Jerry
Thrasher<br></strong>Senior Engineer, WW Corporate Standards<br>Lexmark
International Inc.<br>C14/082-1, 740 New Circle Rd, Lexington Ky
40550<br>Office: +1 859 825 4056 Fax: +1 859 232
7628<br>thrasher(at)lexmark(dot)com</font></font></div></span></div></div>
<div><font face="Arial"></font> </div><br />--
<br />This message has been scanned for viruses and
<br />dangerous content by
<a href="http://www.mailscanner.info/"><b>MailScanner</b></a>, and is
<br />believed to be clean.
</body></html>